How to Know if You’re Lying to Yourself

Part 1

Lola Medicine Keeper, Parser of Truths

03 March 2017

Lately, conversations with friends and clients have swirled around the idea of lying to ourselves.

How do you even know it’s happening? It’s incredibly difficult to know because our mind generates lies to obscure truths we can’t yet identify.

How can you “live your truth” if you don’t even know what your truth is?

You can’t live authentically until you understand how it feels when you’re lying to yourself.

To our egos, the truth is an elusive and tantalizing object of prey. Our minds hunt for the truth like a bargain shopper, and when any inkling of it emerges (especially if it’s counter to the fear factory), it’s systematically eradicated – often well before we are aware it ever tried to surface.

Our truth silently suffocates under a white blanket of lies.

So, how do you identify fiction and unveil authenticity?

Ask yourself the following questions…

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It’s always worth it to uncover your lies.

It’s also usually scary. That’s okay. Your truth is worth facing a little fear for.

Please, continue this journey in the next article of this series: How your body knows you’re lying before you do…

photo credit: Katie Tegtmeyer via photopin cc


  1. Kat

    Here’s my confession: This is exactly the place I’ve been in for the last two years. Probably much longer than that. I have moments of lucidity, of knowing the truth… only to see it disappear around the next corner. Guilt, fear, scarcity mentality kicks in. I allow myself to be misled. I listen to others about what I should do. And sometimes I’m grateful to be told because I’m too confused to know what I truly want. It is a miserable place to be in and I’m so ready to break out of this cycle. I want nothing more than to live authentically and with joy, owning my power and do amazing work. Thank you so much for addressing this issue so eloquently and I’m looking forward to the next post.

    • Medicine Keeper

      I love you for your your bravery in this confession, Kat. It’s true- we get these ephemeral moments of clarity and then they disappear almost as suddenly as they came. The first step of escaping this cycle is to identify the lies – so after this series you’ll be armed with tools to help change your momentum!! Sending so much love. Be kind to yourself – emergence is uncomfortable and frightening… of course we will backtrack during the process, it’s only natural to retreat when we’re scared. They don’t call it courage because it’s easy.

      • Kat

        Thank you, Lola! I love you for all that you do. It’s such comfort to know that I can come back to your blog and dive in. This alone lifts the veil a little more and I catch glimpses of my inner truth. Your writing truly touches my soul.

        Yes, the lies. You know, I realize that one big lie I keep telling myself is that I can’t keep re-inventing myself, that I can’t keep confusing others about what it is that I offer. I’m convinced that if I change things one more time people will think I’m a flake and trust me anymore. So I stop and stick with the latest creation, even though it doesn’t feel quite right still. But I guess the point is to first truly and 100% trust yourself before you can expect others to trust you. I’ll keep exploring and I can see now how much power there is in knowing that what I’m telling myself is the lie that holds me back from what I truly want. XO



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